I spent twenty minutes explaining why I couldn't lend my mate fifty quid. He nodded, said "right, yeah, I get it," then asked "so you're a bit short then?" I didn't answer—just handed him my phone with my bank app open, pointed at the number, and walked away. He called after me: "But like, *why* though?"

I explained to my kid where babies come from. Two minutes later: "But where do they *come from*?" I gave him the full biological rundown. He nodded, satisfied. Thirty seconds of silence. "Dad, but like... where though?" At that point I realized he wasn't asking for information—he was just checking if I'd changed my answer, like maybe I'd been lying the first time and would eventually slip up and admit babies are actually ordered from IKEA.