You're lying there at 11:47 PM, finally warm, finally comfortable, and your brain goes, "Remember that time in 2015 when you said 'you too' to the barber wishing you a nice weekend?" Now you're doing math to figure out if that barber remembers, if he tells other barbers, if there's a barber group chat somewhere ranking your social failures.

You're drifting off at 11:47 PM when your brain decides to present: *that thing you said in the office kitchen in March*. Your body goes rigid. You're now 100% awake, replaying the sentence like it's the Zapruder film, looking for the exact frame where you became unbearable. Sleep cancelled. Your brain has filed this conversation under "Evidence" and will randomly subpoena it for the next six months—always at the worst possible moment, always in 4K.